Sunday, 4 April 2010

Nice pants - The Unborn (2009)

I wasn't actually going to review this but last night I had a nightmare about being possessed by the devil and that I had to perform an exorcism on myself. So I thought maybe I should just get it over and done with before the devil kills me in my sleep and all.

Casey is babysitting a couple of kids when she hears a commotion upstairs. When she gets to the baby's room she finds his seven year old brother standing over him with a mirror, showing him his reflection. "Jumpy wants to be born now" sings the boy, then hits her across the face. Later, the token-black-girl-who-will-die-before-the-credits tells us that it's bad luck for a baby to see their reflection.

Casey then seems to be suffering with bad dreams where the recurring image of a boy stares at her and she starts hearing things in her bathroom cabinet. Later she discovers that she was supposed to be a twin. I must've zoned out for a moment but for some reason we then visit Casey's grandmother, Sofi. She tells the story of her childhood in a concentration camp and explains that the boy Casey is being haunted by is in fact Sofi's brother who died after being experimented on.

There were some great scenes with by standers being possessed by a demon and distorted people doing the crab up and down the stairs but it was just done way better in The Exorcist or even the Exorcism of Emily Rose.

Always been a bit of a fan of Odette Yustman since Cloverfield. Very easy on the eye. So she gets a 10 out of 10. She does get a little upstaged by her pants that she flashes several times. The film however, although I can't honestly say it was the most diabolical film I have ever seen, it's just that I've seen this story before in many different guises. It does try to distract us from this fact though, with the early shock scene of a fetus in the woods. I did like the mask on the dog though; very creepy papier mache of the boy's face. I might make one of those for myself to scare the kids this Halloween. That and the butcher's knife.

10 comments:

  1. One of the only films I have turned off before completion in the last 5 years

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  2. I died a little inside, seeing Gary Oldman in this.

    You were Sid Vicious, dude...

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  3. This scared me. Although this is probably due to the fact that I'm a big girly wimp. It's also put me off eggs for the foreseeable future.

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  4. This movie was so awful in my book. I couldnt take how badly written and acted it was! It wanted to be so much like The Exorcist, but it played it safe.

    The only good thing about it: the main actress was extremely beautiful, and she was in her undies most of the time. (Even in the freaking poster!) but what can you expect from a film produced by Michael Bay. The guy loves to exploit women in his movies!

    A horrible let down this one was.

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  5. This flick was awful. I was expecting a lot more from Goyer.

    I wanted to turn it off but stuck it out.

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  6. I voted this as one of the worst films I saw in '09 in my end of year awards. This movie angered me. Oldman looked like he was just collecting a paycheck....seriously.

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  7. I love how the evil mirror boy in the poster is so desperately competing for attention against the heroine's underwear. This is one you aren't going to win, creepy dead kid.

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  8. Is this a movie about a pair of haunted buttocks?

    Because judging from the promotional materials for this movie that's what it appears to be.

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  9. Best cameltoe scene that year, hands down . . .

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